Food for Thought
Feb. 13th, 2006 11:33 amI was reading through my friends list when Sam asked a question to the Endless Void that is the Intarnets~
Is love primarily a selfish emotion? Why or why not?
I found it so intruguing that I decided to answer it in my own journal and leave it open for responses from you guys!
So, is love a primarily selfish emotion? Depends on the type and stage of love doesn't it? Since there is a paper being written about this question and because Valentine's Day is around the corner, I'm going to assume that it's love that one person can feel for another who isn't related to that person whatsoever.
I definately think that love CAN be selfish, in a sense all emotions can be selfish: sadness, happiness, loneliness, etc. Emotions often times do influence actions so I can easily believe that love can influence a selfish act, such as trying to steal the person away from another person, or refusing to break up with them when the other wants to be alone. The whole thing of falling in love can also be a selfish act, such as choosing one guy over another guy because that guy fits the 'Ideal Guy' better, but you just DO it, you don't ask them if it's all right for you to fall in love with them.
And then comes Courtship Rituals. This feels like the part when love slowly turns from being selfish to being unselfish as you go from wanting them to having them and having to deal with having them. It sounds rather pessimistic but this is the part where the person discovers everything about the other: dislikes, faults, bad habits, hobbies, etc. If there is TWU WUB involved, then the person in love will forget about their own wants at to accept and love each of those faults and sacrifices will be made. As two people grow more attached to each other, there will be a level of selfishness and unselfishness, from big decisions such as disregard for one's own safety, to little ones such as who gets to have the last piece of chocolate in the See's candy box.
Ultimately, all emotions are a double edged sword: selfish and unselfish, dangerous and protective, of self or of others. It's the choices and actions of the person feeling the emotions to make the correct choice to either hurt someone or use it to protect someone.
Of course, Christine Lavin can always say it better~
So if you think you love her, take your time
Walk her in the moonlight
Maybe even try to write a line or two of poetry
Or perhaps a song.
You might find you're building
A love that's going to last a long, long time.
Is love primarily a selfish emotion? Why or why not?
I found it so intruguing that I decided to answer it in my own journal and leave it open for responses from you guys!
So, is love a primarily selfish emotion? Depends on the type and stage of love doesn't it? Since there is a paper being written about this question and because Valentine's Day is around the corner, I'm going to assume that it's love that one person can feel for another who isn't related to that person whatsoever.
I definately think that love CAN be selfish, in a sense all emotions can be selfish: sadness, happiness, loneliness, etc. Emotions often times do influence actions so I can easily believe that love can influence a selfish act, such as trying to steal the person away from another person, or refusing to break up with them when the other wants to be alone. The whole thing of falling in love can also be a selfish act, such as choosing one guy over another guy because that guy fits the 'Ideal Guy' better, but you just DO it, you don't ask them if it's all right for you to fall in love with them.
And then comes Courtship Rituals. This feels like the part when love slowly turns from being selfish to being unselfish as you go from wanting them to having them and having to deal with having them. It sounds rather pessimistic but this is the part where the person discovers everything about the other: dislikes, faults, bad habits, hobbies, etc. If there is TWU WUB involved, then the person in love will forget about their own wants at to accept and love each of those faults and sacrifices will be made. As two people grow more attached to each other, there will be a level of selfishness and unselfishness, from big decisions such as disregard for one's own safety, to little ones such as who gets to have the last piece of chocolate in the See's candy box.
Ultimately, all emotions are a double edged sword: selfish and unselfish, dangerous and protective, of self or of others. It's the choices and actions of the person feeling the emotions to make the correct choice to either hurt someone or use it to protect someone.
Of course, Christine Lavin can always say it better~
So if you think you love her, take your time
Walk her in the moonlight
Maybe even try to write a line or two of poetry
Or perhaps a song.
You might find you're building
A love that's going to last a long, long time.